||[Apr. 1st, 2005|11:44 pm]
what if God was one of us .. just a stranger on a bus ..
Sometimes, I just get this flow. Flow of .. weirdness. And silliness. And I just can't stop thinking. It's like a window that opens. A window to a place where millions of thoughts come from and they come so fast that after two or three seconds I don't remember them and got new thoughts. It happens to fast to even wonder what they mean or what they are about. Am I weird or does this happen to someone else too? It is a good mood, though. I feel so free. Like I'm flying with the thoughts, I become one and know that one day I'll disappear like them and soon to be forgotten. Which makes me think of how life is short. The days fly by and I'm not doing anything. Nothing that makes sence. But I don't care. I'm happy with it. I've learnt to be happy with my sorrow. And I don't want the sorrow to leave me. It's comforting, in a way. [Like I commented one person.] I should stop .. the 'update journal' button just flew up and down the screen .. [Not kidding.]
This endless desire, it's unsatisfiable, unstoppable ..
We want it to stop, but secretly we desire to desire ..
I desire admittige
I desire care
I desire love
I desire victory
I desire friendship
I desire joy
I desire cooprehension of this dark world..
I desire happiness
But secretly I desire sorrow ..